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Be honest
There is no absolute right or wrong about love. When you love someone, you feel the love, when you don't love someone, you don't feel it. As simple as that. And I am talking about the "love" between man and woman.
No one can guarantee to love another person forever. Literally you might, but realistically it is not possible. It is true that very likely after certain period of time, say a few years after being together, your love transforms to that type of love that more like family members, sibling, rather than lovers.
I always think that as an adult, we have to be responsible to ourselves and those whom our behanviors would impact. It doesn't matter what you decide to do eventually, you have to take the consequence.
In your case, I think the responsible way is to be honest to both women - your wife and your lover. Be honest to your wife about what had happened and that you don't love her any more. I think it is worse than divorcing her if you continue cheating on her. I would imagine that your lover is aware that you have a wife. If you decide that you want to be with your lover instead, get a clean cut with your wife. It is not fair to either of them should you attempt to keep both of them in your life.
It will be devastating for your wife to accept the fact that you no longer have feelings for her, that you don't love her any more. But at least she will know the truth, and she will deal with whatever she has to deal with to move on after griefing.
I don't think that you intentionally create such triangle relationship. And I understand we are only human beings, and we can't control our feelings. To be frank, I personally don't agree to try to tie a relationship with responsibility(such as kids etc.). I am a love believer. It might sound unrealistic but I do believe that there is true love existing in this world and every one of us deserves that. Be true to yourself, to those whom your behavior impact, so every one has a chance to pick up one's life and move on. How would you know that your wife won't have a better and happier life after leaving you should seperation is what you would choose instead of trying to revitalize your relationship with your wife?
Anyway, you might not agree with what I said but good luck with resolving the problem. Be honest to your wife, that is the least respect you can give her since you are the one who is cheating on her, although I did say that there is no right or wrong about love and I saw that you said you fell in love with another woman.
p.s. I can read Chinese but can't write so... |
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楼主: zzzzgggg
狗仔卡
发表于 2006-8-25 05:47:12
显身卡
